Tuesday, March 30, 2010

The Good, the Bad, and the Smelly

Today was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad afternoon. Okay, so it wasn't that bad, but what started as a Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood kind of morning, slowly turned into one big mess. And it all began innocently enough with a diaper change after Gillian Grace's afternoon nap. Clearly my, normally spot on, poopdar must've been on the fritz, as I was completely unprepared for what was awaiting me in her diaper. GG must've had a little help from UPS delivering this package because it was mushed, squished, and very apparent just how much Brown can do. Without ample warning of the level 3 bio hazard that awaited, I was not properly prepared for the task at hand. Thus I was destined for failure before I'd even begun. Already a bit stymied by the mere size of the job, it was then that I began to notice the horrendous mind-numbing stintch. {Seriously, how can something so tiny produce something so foul?} Now totally rattled by my lack of preparedness and beginning to feel a little light headed from the stink of it all, I began to hurry. In hindsight, this was probably the moment it all went to hell in a handbasket. In an effort to keep her legs and feet poop free, I ripped off the diaper as quickly as I could. Only the diaper didn't fully release from both sides at the same time. The right side tape got stuck, so I did the logical thing and pulled harder. Big mistake! Obviously, I put just a tad too much power behind that last tug because the tape released sending my hand flying backward with the diaper. And, as we all learned from high school physics, objects in motion tend to stay in motion until an external force is applied. Hand meet hutch, i.e. the external force. As though it was happening in slow motion, I watched the diaper fall from my hand, to the changing table...icky side down. With the other hand firmly pressed holding GG to the changing table I looked on, helplessly, as a round poop rolled out of the diaper, off the changing table, and landed with a bounce on the floor. Not willing to let that dollop of doo get the best of me, I tended to my lil' one first then the carpet. Nothing a little Woolite carpet cleaner couldn''t handle! Mom- 1 Poop Terd-0.

Gillian Grace was not quite sure what to make of the entire situation.

Then, in an overzealous attempt to organize my online photos this evening, I inadvertently changed the coding (i.e. the html link) for all the pictures featured on my blog. Although at the time it seemed like Armageddon, my worst fear was completely unfounded---the pictures were not gone forever, just temporarily inaccessible until I updated the coding. Whew, crisis averted!

And as if on cue, an email appeared in my inbox that made my whole evening do an about face. A friend sent me a link to a YouTube video along with this question: Is this Gillybean in a few short months? After viewing the video, I can only say that I most certainly hope so!

I do believe the first part of this video is self-explanatory and for those that know me well, the second part will be too. But since there's no shame in my game, I don't mind repeating what I've said before many, many times...I love me some Jon Bon Jovi. Like the little girl in this video, let's hope Gillian has great taste in music too!

And after hearing about our neighbors' trip the ER with their 3 year old this evening, it brought my so-called horrible afternoon into perspective. I lead a charmed and blessed life, no doubt about it. I have a beautiful and healthy baby, a caring and wonderful husband, and loving and supportive family and friends. So beside a little less poop, what more could a Mama ask for?

How was your evening?


Mary K Brennan said...

It's funny how some of the simpliest of things can unravel us. We don't usually realize how funny it is untill we sit down to blog about it.
I've had those Woolite moments, and can I add, I don't miss them a bit.

Krysta said...

HAHA! I love the poop story!! Thanks for the stroller info too!

The Ross Family said...

I haven't had that happen to me yet, but have been very close! We are transitioning out of baby food, and his poopies aren't as pasty anymore (TMI?) - and now, are more like pebbles! Yikes! Wow. I can't believe I just wrote all that.

Andi said...

Thanks for the laugh out loud story. I had a great visual going! Glad to hear that your evening ended well. Crazy how remembering that there is a world outside our four walls brings life into perspective. Kudos to you for recognizing it!

Carey said...

That story totally cracked me up! I HATE when the tape gets stuck like that :)